Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Bling bling

Here they are folks. My new shoes:

Nothing fancy. Avia brand that I got onsale and used a $5 gift card!

Some day I'll have fancy shoes that were fit for me.

For right now though - these are perfect.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Note to self

Note to self:

Take pictures of new shoes.

They aren't much - but some day I'll look back and remember what a sacrifice it was just to get them.


When I was little my Uncle would take us to AM/PM a lot. To be honest I'm not sure what we got...but at some point, in the back of his white Toyota pick-up truck my cousins, brothers and I took it upon ourselves to make up an AM/PM song. Maybe it was the mix of ages, the close space or the Slurpees we'd devored...but we thought it was hilarious and it stuck with us for years. Even now it pops into my mind. (AM, PM, it's a mini-market, flying through the sky...*)

AM/PM has been a mental theme of mine today. Why? Well for two reasons:

(1) I stopped there about thirty minutes ago.
(2) I need to make a decision about when to schedule my run time.

In my uber-productive day I missed my big note to myself to make bread. Being a gluten-free family means that we make our own bread. Let's clarify. I make it. And I use a bread mix. Nothing hard - but it does mean that I have to take some extra time to do it. So I cannot just get up in the morning and run to buy some.

Which leads me to the stop at AM/ provide enough caffeine for me to make it from now until 1.5 hours from now when the bread will be done.

Once in the store I stood for a long time before pushing that Diet Coke button. See, Diet Coke and I are frenemies. I love to hate Diet Coke. And I hate that I love Diet Coke. Last year I quit it completely. Like any other addiction (yes, I am addicted) once I have a little I want it all the time.

And it plays with my body. I cannot sleep right at night. I get hot and sweaty at weird times in the day when temperature isn't a factor. The caffeine high makes me unbelievably tired at the wrong moments. Of course that just begins the cycle again...

Oh AM/PM what do I do? Should I fill up my cup?

Here's where the other issue comes in...

I really want to change my runs from PM to AM. Both RunMan and I have been running at night. On the plus side that means we stretch together and it's cooler outside. On the other hand the boys are in bed which means we run at different times and, like tonight, when RunMan has a long run he's getting home at 11:00pm.

What to do...what to do...

I pushed the button. I filled up my drink. And I've been sitting here drinking it. Even with all these things going on in my head I can't reject it.

The benefit to all this is clarity. I know I need to run in the mornings. I tend to be more productive (meaning earlier bread making sessions!) and my day starts off, literally, on the right foot. RunMan can then run earlier in the evening and we can actually have time.

The other truth from AM running is that I crave things less. I tend to be more aware of what I put in my body because I've spent the morning running. At night I feel less aware of my nutrition through the day because as long as it doesn't effect my running...I don't care.

In the meantime AM/ and I are going to see less of each other. Much less.

*the song is lacking when in black/white. Next time you're around me, have me sing it. It still probably won't make sense because, well, those are all the lyrics.

Monday, September 14, 2009


Two miles.

17 minutes and 22 seconds.

A personal record for two miles.

And I'm back!

Like riding a bike

It's time.

I'm about to set off for my first run longer than it should be.

Being off of my running schedule has been tough. I haven't been as focused - in anything - or motivated.

I got my new shoes last week. Went for a great walk this weekend in them.

Now, I feel ready to get my groove back.

I'm keeping it short. Only a mile. Maybe two if I feel good after mile one.

I keep telling myself that I'm keeping it short because don't want to get hurt again - but honestly it's really because if I mentally try to push myself right now I think I'll end up disappointing myself. Then I'll end up wanting to stop again.

It's sad...but true. The mental part of this has always been the hardest for me. Some day it won't be.

So short. For success.